three faces of death
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treat thyself
Am I capable of moderation?
With smoking? No, certainly not.
With cocktails? I think I am!
Today is two cocktails, some french fries, and my book ~as a treat~
Also I got new sunnies. c:
i guess i look particularly Gay today
Some idiot slowed their car down just to scream “fuckin queer” at me, so I guess I’ll take that as a W.
journal (july ‘25)
The good news is: I’m doing better now.
I still really like this entry though. I think my bird self is Cute.
Some of this is probably hard to read/illegible, but it doesn’t matter much.
not girl dinner, not boy dinner, but a secret third thing
Fried rice mastery is almost there.
Omelette mastery is… not even close.
Store bought sweets ~as a treat.